Reasons Why You Shouldn't Get A Freelancer As Gf

1) Full of surprises

We are always full of surprises in term of flying around. We could be telling you: Bi, I'm going to Malacca this weekend ya. When we are back, we will be like: Bi, I'm flying to Pangkor ya this week. Then when we back again, Bi, next week I got another job in Penang ya. We are always flying around even though we are not air stewardess. Obviously you only get to see your gf packing and unpacking all the time.

2) Love the job more than you

We love our job that's what make us work non stop. We could just take 2 jobs in a day, morning one job, then rush like hell to the second job. Tired but we love it because we love the money we earned.

3) Ditching you

Like I said, we are always full of surprises and also emotional sometime for some reason. Like you're hanging out with you gf, paktor,holding hand, sweet sweet. Suddenly her phone rang and she read through the message then her face changed. No, not her grandma passed away, not her pets fall into longkang, not her neighbour running naked. It's just she got a message that: Dear, tonight can work? RMXXX at XYZ from Xpm-Xpm.

Then she will be like: Bi, I want to work leh. Hanging out with you need to spend money, but I go work got money. Poor bf, he doesn't know how to respond. If he says yes, then he cannot paktor d. If he says no then he needs to face the black face gf the whole day.

See, we do love our job right?

4) Too independent

Sometime we are just way too independent that freak you out. Like we are so freaking insane in some cases. We can travel so far to a not familiar place and with people who just knew like few seconds ago just for work. Then we can be best friends with those people who just knew few seconds ago. And also if there are no transport, no car, no nothing for us to go to work in a non-familiar place, we could just grab a cab by ourself, catch a train, catch a horse just to go to work while waze-ing that place!

5) Know lots of guys and rich fellow

In every events that we work in, we get to know bunch of guys no matter they are the crew at the back stage, the event organizer, the emcee, the keh leh feh or even the guests in the event. Like in a day we will meet hundred of people. No, I mean in a few hours event, we met that much of humans. Also, there's lots of VIP, rich people, Dato Datin in the event. Then sometime those people sure come to disturb lengluis and ask for phone numbers. See, your gf market so big. You got so much of competitors.

6) Ugly

Yes, we are ugly. When we hang out with you, we show you the true face. The over damn fucking extremely terrible horrible vegetable scary naked face specially for YOU, my dear. Because while we working, we have the full make up ever in the world, highest heels ever in the world, brightest smile ever in the world, sexiest pose ever in the world. So when we see you, we almost half dying with messy hair, dirty face and casual shirts on us with the beautiful slippers that only cost RM10. Just to hangout with you. Normal people don't get to see us in this condition. Appreciate it.

7) Always busy on phone

For some reasons, I think we even busier than businessman. Businessman busy in meetings, planning, etc etc. But us, we are so busy on phone, checking if any new jobs posted, looking for replacement when we want to ffk a low pay job, finding girls for friends in an event and eat commission, stalking that bitch who selfie with your bestfriend, checking any promotion in their branded stuff and so on and on and on. When bf ask what are you busy in your phone, and they gonna be like: Oh, just jobs, well you know..

8) Pictures in her phone

When you steal her phone and check her gallery, you gonna be freaking out also. Why? Not because she has secret affairs with another rich guy but because her phone is full of pictures of her and lots of different crazy bitches. And your pictures with her are like just that few slides. That's normal and please don't get jealous!

9) Always make you worried

Yes, we are so unpredictable! We can be in Penang today and Malacca tomorrow. We can catch a train, grab a cab by ourself when you're so busy to send us to work. We sometime have an event til late night and still not afraid to catch a taxi home. We also not afraid of going to travel with some strangers that just knew few seconds ago, not afraid to get on a car where you just knew the driver few minutes ago, not afraid to photoshoot with a stranger that never met before. Being a bf, you gotta get ready to be worried 24/7.

10) Dreams

If you ask them what are their dreams, 9 out of 10 will give you the same answer.

Travel !

That's why we work so hard, earn so hard, just to go far far away to see how the world looks like.

What's that mean to you? It means they gonna ditch you here in Malaysia alone again and go travel by herself! That unpredictable bitch is flying again!

End of story! 

Latest photoshoot, hehe!

Page: Georgina Woo
Instagram: georginawoo91

Moist Diane: The Next Generation of Oil Hair Care

Before I am invited to the Moist Diane launch in KL, I swear to god I never heard of this brand. The launching of Moist Diane which launch in Grand Millennum Hotel on 9th February. This is the first time I actually attend this kind of event as a blogger.

Show you my sexy back with oily hair scalp first:D 

This is the logo which I like it so much on the first sight. Let's not waste our time, I'll go straight to the point.

Can check all these in your nearby Watsons. 

What's so unique about this Moist Diane shampoo? It's actually the next generation of oil hair care shampoo and conditioner to the mass? 

YES, it's oil. When I heard it I was like: Wahlau eh, my hair so oily somemore this shampoo so oily? Confirm not suitable d lah. 

But I was wrong, the benefits of the oil on our hair go far beyond our imagination. It's a rich source of nutritional ingredients, and it's directly supplies nutrients to your scalp and hair, also, it adheres dirt for effective cleansing and controls dry and frizzy hair. 

Okay, I know it's bored to talk about this because I'm getting bored with myself too. I can't wait to share my experience!! 

On the first week I was using, I really don't feel anything. It's just a ordinary shampoo. Nothing special. Then I was gonna freak out because if this shampoo it's nothing good, then what should I write it on my blog? 

Okay, so the first week it's actually disappoint me. Then I realized, wahlau eh, I just bleach my hair, no wonder my hair tangle easily and it's so dry no matter how much conditioner I put. Trust me, I put so much hope on this shampoo that's why I was so disappoint at the beginning. On the second week, this is the best part, finally I can feel the different. On the day I writing this post, I use it with all my heart on this. 

The moment I squeeze the shampoo out, OMG it tastes... errr I mean it smells so good so sweet. It is!! I like it when there's bubbles when you massaging your hair scalp :D 

Then I rinse off the shampoo and now the conditioner time. HOHOHOHOHO, believe me. If you have long hair, conditioner is a must. This conditioner is not like ordinary conditioner, you can feel the thickness of it when it's on your palm. And when you put it on your hair, you can feel that it's protecting your hair. 

Okay now the hair dryer time. The moment when I blowing my hair, I can feel my hair like barbie doll's hair which I dislike, because it feels like tangle easily and when I comb it, the hair drop off like I got cancer. Of course, after everything done, I feel like I'm bold. Why? Because my head is so light like I got no hair anymore. HAHAHAHAHA. I'm not kidding with this. I really feel light and it's same feelings like those saloon shampoo I used to use it and it's really expensive.

When I'm outstation, it's impossible for me to bring the whole bottle of saloon shampoo I bought. Because it's too big and heavy! So I always ended up buying some random brand hair shampoo and conditioner in Watsons. You know la, the price cheap cheap, the shampoo also not good til where already ma. 

But with Moist Diane shampoo, it's not expensive at all and it's freaking affordable plus it has the same effects like those luxury expensive saloon shampoo. I guess I'll have to spend my own money to buy it after these because they gave us free sample to use :D 

 This is the one they give us to try. (Me like free stuffs like a cheapskate hehehehe)

It's funny how people never appreciate free things from others. But I'm not. I use these with all my heart and figure out what's special about it instead of reading the ingredients. Feel it with heart, not eyes. And also feel it with your hair hahaha. 

After so many times of using this Moist Diane shampoo, finally it's look good and feel so light and not tangle anymore. My friend loves to touch my hair and she said Wah, I like your hair, it's soft and long and your hair don't look oily ;D ! Thanks ya sampat po :D <3 nbsp="" p="">

So that's all about it. My first time attend this kind of launching event as a blogger and get to know this new shampoo from Japan. Best part is we get the shampoo and conditioner for free. hahahahahah. I wish I could stop acting like a cheapskate. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ulLyeaJx-xw

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DblcxSq1DmE 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uwW0Ex1K8oI

(Moist Diane Shampoo commercial from Japan, check it out haha because it's funny)

Girls, you should try this shampoo. It's not difficult to find because it's everywhere! You can get it in Watsons. 

I'm so happy because I'm sharing good stuff wuhoooo :D 

Throwing Party at Home

I always want to throw a party and invite all of my friends to come over. You know like those american, how they throw out at party, put the song loud, free flow of beers, liquor when their parents are away. Sounds really fun though as I never did before.

But, if I really gonna do this. That would be disaster. First of all, is either I create the event in facebook and invite everyone I know or I don't know. Whatever it is. Make it happening. What's the feedbacks and questions will be like.....

1) Got parking ah?

"Eh, I can come lah that night, but your place got parking ah? Where should I park my car?"

"Park at the highway, walk in to my garden. You think my house is shopping mall meh, so many parking lot."

2) No transport

"Eh, so late leh. I can't lah. No people send me home. I don't know want to ask which water fish to send me wor."

Walk can ah? Start walking now, should be reach tomorrow night.

3) So far

"Wah, you stay so far ah? Can't lah so far. Next time lah. You throw the party nearer to my place I can go."

I throw boom at your house better lah.

4) Traffic jam

"Wah, your place always traffic jam one wor. Cannot go lah sorry."

Lau eh, you don't go out la. Stay at home sure no traffic jam.

5) Your friends I don't know

"You invite who? I know or not? If I don't know I don't want go lah. Later I stand there alone emo."

Lau eh, correct also. With this kind of pattern sure no one wants to talk to you lah. You stay at home sit at the corner emo la.

6) Got lengzai lenglui?

"Got invite pretty girls handsome boys or not?"

Got, I'm inviting you already. To make them feel handsome/pretty.

7) Working tomorrow

"Sorry la, working tomorrow. Can't attend. Have fun." 

Lau ehhhhhhh, you working tomorrow, not working now. OMG. I didn't ask you party til tomorrow alsoooooooooooooo.

8) I shy

"Eh, many people going ah? I shy leh?'

Knnmccb, shy don't come out la. Stay at home drink nen nen can?

9) Why don't want go club?

"Why at your house? Why don't want go club?"

Lau eh, later you fall asleep you want sleep at toilet bowl or house sofa?

10) Think first.

"I think think first la. Not sure can go or not."

Lau eh, I ask you marry me meh now? Need to think so much.

11) No money

"Tight budget la. End of the month d." 

Lau eh, I didn't ask you buy whole lorry of milk to come over also.


Actually I'm just saying all these shits. I like party but I don't drink, I don't smoke, I just love the loud music and chilling with lots of people for no reason. Hahahahaha. I'm just being weird.

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Page: Georgina Woo

Someone tell me what to do?

Talking about my last job in Malacca, a bikini show. They require us to do catwalk beside the pool. Okay, easy job. Payment not too bad, not very high also.

So what pissed me off was, we did our rehearsal. Okay, and one girl wasn't there. Alright, that's fine. There are 3 of us from KL, and the left are from Malacca. Total there are 8 models. 3 Malacca girls, 2 Malacca guys and then 3 of us.

Rehearsal was great, nothing special. And the one girl who wasn't there, they said she is alright, we always have her in our show. She knows what to do. Okay after the rehearsal, they send us back to hotel check in and everything. Then we are going for make up. When we just get there, omg, the room was dark, make up artist need them to carry flash and flash to their face just to let them make up.

We were waiting and then we decided that we should just make up by ourselves because we don't want to late for the show. So 3 of us went back to our hotel room and started make up. Okay, finally it's 10pm. We went to the bar. They just tell us to do good in the show.

Here's come the first round with hawaii outfit. First round with slow walk, then come back. With your partner and lastly with the guy. Oh gosh, the girl who absent for the rehearsal actually did wrong and all of us behind just followed. Why are we following blindly? Because this is Malacca and they are much familiar. Maybe they decided to change route and never get to inform us? Okay, so we just follow what they did.

Actually it's totally a mess up. The last of the first round should be with the guys but 3 of the Malacca girls actually gone. They were at the upstairs and we were waiting downstairs for them. They gotta get out first then only it's our turn(the kl girls' turn). Guys don't want to go out first because they are waiting for them. So we can't do anything since this is Malacca. After all these it should done for the first round. So we went to the back stage. And the person in charge waiting for us.

He scolded us like a dog, said we didn't do like what we did in rehearsal. Okay great. Then he said you guys should keep going out until the music stopped! (No one tell us when to stop seriously). So okay, lesson learned. We must do better in the second round.

FYI, those models are students of the person in charge. You must know this. First round, they didn't do what they should do in rehearsal. They disappear for the last walk in the first round. Okay.

Second round was great. We keep walk until the music stopped. Let me make things clear. 2 models should go out first, then switch me n another Malacca model, next will be two KL girls and lastly the 2 male models. But it went wrong, I get out first because 1 girl was missing so I have to go or else we will get scold again. The music still going on.

Okay, then they kinda come back to backstage and tell us that, one of the Malacca girl come to us and say we must keep walk even though our jobs is done. The music on, we go. Doesn't matter who. If your partner went missing, it's okay. See who is available just go. One of the KL girl respond to her saying that, is your partner problem, you should communicate with your partner, not us. We are doing great here. My partner won't went missing or not going out like this.

Is actually small matter that I don't care, as long as we make a good show. But it ended up like what you know? I felt like I got cheated in that show. You know what is 吊花场？Someone tell me what is call in english please. At the end of the show, they want us to walk around the whole place and there's a guy following us asking those customers if they want to buy us some flowers. I totally feel like duh we are not here for this shit !! If they buy flowers for you, ah well, you just need to take a pictures with them or maybe drink with them? I got no idea. We didn't say much as long as we are safe. No one buy flowers for us. End of the show, we leave.

End of story. That's it. The next day, that's the disaster happen. We got told that we are not getting any cents for this job. We were like WHAT THE FUCK???

The person in charge blame us for not doing a great show. We are not good. Not professional. Is okay, I asked one of the male model if they get their payment they said monday. So ok, we will just wait and see.

On monday, I asked again about the payment. He said not yet. Is okay, I'll just call the person in charge. The moment when he knows I'm one of the model in that show. Wahlau, he started his M16 to me. He start scold from the conversation til the end of the conversation and he cut off the line. I was like........

In the conversation, he said you girls ruined my fucking show. I was suppose to have the 1 year contract with that hotel. Now the boss is not giving me any cents and I lost my contract also. Thanks to you girls. I paid deposit to your agent already. You know how much we got? An outstation job wear bikini catwalk show wei, they give us RM100+++ per person. And he even said I felt it's too much for you girls.

I'm so speechless, I tried to get the number of the boss from that hotel. Just to confirmed if the person in charge not cheating us. But my friend who works in the hotel told me that the boss seldom come also. Even come also awhile and look around. Can he actually not paying any cents for the show?!

In the conversation, the person in charge keep saying the boss complain you girls sucks. Not doing a good show. Not even professional. But I never see the boss the whole night. Maybe he got cctv or spy to tell him? I think he is mad with us because no one buy flowers for us so they don't get the extra $$$. Maybe?

I'm naive. I don't know who is not telling the truth. I don't care what's going on. I just want my money back. RM100+ is not even enough.

So here's the question, do you think I should public all their names here? No one seem to give me a good answer. The conclusion of that is you only get this much of money and that's about it. For me is like, we are doing it good for you. We did it great. But it shouldn't end up like this. You know what they request? They want us to go back to Malacca, back to the hotel and talk to each other face to face.

My friend said we should just let our agent do the job. But the thing is the agent wasn't there on that night, she can't help much.

Whenever I think back how he scolded me on the phone, scolded us at the backstage and lastly not getting the full payment, I honestly want to kick his balls so hard. But he said he doesn't get any $$ from the boss. Thus, I don't know what can I do.

Im angry and there are lots of typo. KTHXBYE

Freelance Agent We Dislike

Not those property agents Im talking about, not about insurance or whatsoever. It's just those agents that hire us (freelancers) for those events.

Now, let's talk about how annoying and disgusting they could be. I hope I don't offence any of my agent friends here. If you really pissed off by me, please don't tell me you did that. 

1) Dragging the payment. 

If you can't pay us on time like what you had promise, then informed us and apologize. Or just informed us that your company hasn't get the pay from client or whatsoever. Don't let us wait like a bitch there trying to chase you about the payment. We are not lack of money, we just afraid you run away with those few hundred bucks there. Just the few hundred dude. 

Is okay if you can't pay on time, just tell us. We understand. Don't be a douche bag for not replying our message after it's seen! 

2) Low payment

It's really okay for me if it's low paymentttttt. How low is it? You want those girls stand so many hours and you only give like $100? Plus, you want us to do so many things. And you required us to do full make up, high heels and everything. Seriously? For so many hours? Why don't you hire your auntie to do it for you? I'm fine with low payment as long as I got job. But just don't ask a girl to carry heavy stuffs like I'm a man. 

3) Escort agents 

I don't hate those escort agents. What I hate is they randomly text girls and ask them if they are interested. And they kinda like forcing you without really that's fucking obvious. It's funny when they say It's good money, you only need to be there for few hours and you got this much of money. Trust me, it's a very attractive amount of money. Escort sounds so elegant, but in a bad way, we call it prostitute. You get paid by having sex with some rich guys. Escort agents get paid by bringing girls for those rich guys. Sometime their commission are fucking high.

One random guy actually ask why are you not doing this? You see, it's good pay, you had fun, you know rich people. Yea, right dude. Ask your girlfriend or your mama do it. 

4) Asking you out. 

Oh gosh, it's fine that an agent ask you out for lunch dinner or supper or whatsoever. Maybe he had a crush on you! It's normal that you see that agent you know in relationship with a girl you work before. I think it's sweet. But just don't be a dickhead asking every girls that you know please. Freelance world is small, once your name and your phone number share by us, everyone started to anti you. 

I had an experience that an agent ask me out to meet in a cafe because their office is way too far from me. He said he needs to interview me and see if I look exactly the same with pictures. So the interview went very well and he said he will give me some jobs in the future. Alright, great =) 

Then the next week, he keep asking me out for drinks. And I was like, I don't have a car and I can't catch a public transport to meet him up at night. So he offered me to give me a ride and I was like no fucking way! What if you don't want to send me home? Is a fucking nightmare that he keeps texting me asking me out. I was alright at the beginning when he asking me out for drinks. Once, he said he is on the way to my place to pick me up so we could go for a drinks, and I was waiting for like half an hour. He said he is on the way and when I ask where the fuck are you? He just can't tell me where the hell he is. Then I act like a bitch said that: dude, why don't we just cancel the outing, I can't go out so late at night. Well then, good bye ! 

And trust me, a disaster happen. LOL, he kept scolding me on whatsapp, voice message, like, why the fuck are you doing this to me? Don't you know there is traffic jam while I'm on my way? You can't do this to me. You promised to come out. I got so freak out and I share his phone number in one of my freelancer girls group and asked who the fuck is this guy? The answers those girls giving me actually make me feel relieve. They said he is fucking weird, keep asking every girls out for interview but never give them jobs.

But I feel bad for making him come all the way to my place. (Not even sure if he actually coming).

Go fuck yourself! 

5) Talk bad about you

Gosh, is alright if you gossip telling other people which girls are lazy, which girls hardworking, which girls are extremely beautiful, which girls are freaking arrogant and so on. But just make sure your words don't come back to us. We would fight back telling everyone that your jobs sucks, you never give us payment on time, your jobs scope are different from what you told us. 

Good luck in looking for girls to work for you in the future, you dumbass. 

6) Keep texting you 

Is okay to text us if you have a jobs. Just don't waste your time text us asking have you eaten? What you doing now? Are you working tomorrow? How old are you? 

Omg just stop it. You are busy, I am busy. Why are you doing this? 

Is even disgusted me when one of the agent text me: Hey I got a job. I asked what? Reply my message. 

"... ...." 

7) Not replying messages when we asking a freaking serious question. I'm not kidding, I'm serious.

When they want you to confirm if you can work, they being so fierce asking you to reply for confirmation. When you ask them about the jobs, they never reply. Like NEVERTHEFUCK. Even worst when they promised there's allowance for the jobs like parking allowance, foods allowance, petrol allowance. Oh gosh, they "cui gong lan pa song". 

Say very clever, when you ask for the allowance, they gone d. Only give you the basic. Niaseng. Waste my petrol go so far, payment so low, somemore parking so expensive. Deduct everything I eat also not enough d. And they just gone d. The numbers you have call is not available. Don't have say don't have la, don't cheat me go so far. I can find other girls for you ma. Lau eh! 

8) Too much commission 

I understand you will absolutely get commission from the client. But don't so much can or not. A girl, client paid you $400, and you took $200 and you gave us $200. Half of it dude. Seriously? And there are 8 girls. Are you fucking kidding me? 

Now I know why there are so many agents out there. 

Alright, I know what you're thinking. Girls are so hard to please. They get paid so high by being vase there, do nothing at all and so many patterns asking for allowances. Duh, sometime I feel like I'm over pattern. But when I need to stand with the high heels, thick make up and set nice hair. I honestly feel that that's not the price you should be giving. We need to walk around with the high heels, approach customers, talk to the public, creating awareness, and so on. Come, I pay you, you do it. 

9) Ask us to reach venue earlier 

I'm fine if you want us to reach earlier for us to get ready, touch up the make up, brief us and so on. But honestly, if you want us to be there so early, make sure you dont late too! 

It's always pissed me off when they want us to be there earlier do nothing and keep asking us to wait. Somenore keep warning us: Girls, please be there sharp at 11.30am! When you reached there and text them they never reply d. 

Sohai, then I come so early for what? It's not like we got extra pay. You also haven't reach somemore request so much. Your brain masuk air hio?! 

10) Job scope never tell properly 

Before work you only tell us we need to do this. Ok fine, with this much of payment, that long of hours, with just some little things to do. I think is fine. But it always so stupid when you reached there started working, they give you different, difficult and annoying stuff to do. Seriously? 

Is it so difficult for you to tell us that job scope might change or different? In the job details you said we only have to give flyers, but when we reach there you want us to approach customers and get their details. Why don't you straight away write it in the job details????? 

I expect that Low payment long hours is only for giving out flyers. Not approach customers, stopped them from walking, ask them write their details for me. And keep forcing us to get more details from people in the mall. Wahlau eh!! No extra pay meh? 

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Facebook page: Georgina Woo

How Good To Be A Lesbian

Sometime I wonder how great it is if my partner is a girl? We can do lots of things together and still have lots of fun..

If my dating partner is a girl, then...

1) We can go to the washroom and selfie together :D

Couple loves to take pictures and selfie, and the best place to snap pictures will always be in the washroom. Big mirror and good lighting!

2) More caring than a guy.

They know how pain is your period pain, they know what you need, they know why are you upset, they know how to make you happy, they know why girls love shopping so much, they know why you keep going to the saloon. Not saying guys don't know any of these, but girls understand more :)

3) Sleepover!!

It's weird to bring a guy to sleepover in my house. Mom gonna ask a lot if I bring a guy to my house and say he's gonna sleep in my room tonight. My mum is a typical chinese, she is absolutely gonna chop me into 18 pieces and put me in the refrigerator. Is different when I bring a girl to my house and say, mum, girls pillow talk tonight.

4) Sharing clothes together :D

You got lots of extra choices to choose what to wear for the day. Extra clothes, shoes, sneakers, heels, pants and etc. You can even share underwear and bras LOL. Just kidding.

5) Shopping together.

When you bring a guy to do your shopping, what you see is him scrolling his phone, looking for chairs to sit, hold everything you bought, and keep yawning. They even like to say: Oh god, I love shopping with my gf! It's fucking lie. I can see the boredness deep inside their heart. How good if you bring a girl along, you can bring her to buy bra and underwear together without being shy :D

6) Emergency stuff

What if your period come to visit you while you sleepover at your gf's house? Wow, she has the pad too !! :D

7) Good listener

They are absolutely the best listener ever in the world. They listen they understand and they trying to help. But for guys, when you tell them your problems, they only take it as the constant nagging. Then they will try to avoid you by watching their football matches.

8) Don't worry about cheating

Sometime you just too worry about your bf cheating on you. HE FUCKED WITH THE GIRL!! They gonna come back to you and say it's man needs or it's so sudden. But with a girl, she might be cheating but at least not with her dick xD

9) Who's gonna pay the bills?

It's so awkward when you gotta worry who's gonna pay the bills when you in a date with a guy. If you pay it, guys gonna feel awkward. If the guy pays it, I feel like I owe him something. But when you with a girl, I don't care. This time mine, next time YOU!

10) Getting naked and shower together.

I always have a thing that I'm so shy to get naked infront of guys. Like a no-no in my life. But when I'm with a girl, gosh, I just don't fucking care at all. I'm going to shower, you wanna join? xD

11) Don't have to worry about getting pregnant

This is so not my thing, I still support sex after marriage :D

So shut up!

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如果狗会说话，那我希望它会回答我...

狗狗不会说话，而且它们有时也表达不了自己。它们就是会给你种眼神告诉你它想要什么，而它们有时也不明白你在说什么。所以我们就这样用眼神交流。有时我看着狗，看它看着我，我就会问它：why? what you want? har? 就这样，其实我希望狗会跟我说话。

#1 有时从外面回来，家里一个人都没有，只有那只狗跳来跳去，跑出跑进，很开心的吠呀吠～好像要告诉整条街我回来了这样。这时我就会问我的狗，我妈妈咧？我哥哥咧？他们去哪里？

如果狗真的会说话，那它可能会回答我：你妈妈去她朋友家打麻将，没有４０圈都不回来，你午餐晚餐自己解决，最重要的还有本少爷的午餐晚餐。我午餐想吃这个，晚餐想吃那个。你哥哥也一样不回来了，所以今晚的散步环节你要负责带我去，我想去desa park city那边逛，那天看到了一个妹子还真的不错看！好，就这样决定。你回来我就放心了，我先去睡午觉。

#2 有时我躺在床上看戏时，那只傻狗就会在我隔壁看着。我就会问：你想怎样？看到这样。要什么就讲，不要一直看看看。我不知道你想什么的。

如果它会回答我的话，那我觉得它会说：妖秀A, wa ai ki bang jiu lah! 尿急到膀胱都烂了你还看我看你的。甘纳塞，下次醒目点好不好。要是我在客厅尿了，你就要给我洗干净，不然晚上你有排给妈妈骂，零用钱都没了。你自己看着办吧小主人。

#3 有时我在吃着东西的时候，那傻狗又来了。天啊～你想怎样？给你吃了我吃什么？　

如果它会回答的话：你一个人吃会吃肥啦，分一点给我又不会怎样？有福同享，有难同当啊！来啦，就给我一小块啦。不要吝啬喂。我都准备Hand给你了你还想怎样。

#4 有时睡得很甜的时候，那只傻狗会在外面一直吠一直吠。吠了又吠，还要跟我来个high key的吠。不醒都不能了。那时我就会出去问它，你吠什么喔你？7早8早你不睡别人也要睡啊！ 

如果它回答我的话，那它应该会说：靠腰，你看外面那条瘦狗跟我TMD的喷尿在那边！这条街好歹也是本少爷的。它这样根本就是要跟我过不去啊！你别拉着我，让我去决一胜负，给我去，别拉我。 

少爷，你去吧。我没拉着你，门都已经帮你开好了，你在等什么？顺便买早餐给我，我继续睡了。

#5 有时外面有人按门铃，傻狗的反应最大。可以从家的后尾吠到屋外。你这么激动干嘛？妹子来找你是吧？谁在外面？

如果它肯回答我的话，它应该想表达：怎么知道是谁，吠就是啦。给外面的人知道这家有恶狗，看他们怕不怕！

少爷，你这样子像恶狗吗？

#6 有时睡到朦朦胧胧的时候，我就会感觉到那条傻狗跳上来睡在我脚边。那时候我就会问它：喂，你睡客厅的好不好？谁让你进来吹冷气了。

如果它会回答，那它应该也朦朦胧胧的说：客厅很热，你舍得让本少爷在外面过夜吗？ 

#7 有时在客厅看戏时，傻狗会把头放在你手边，就一直撞你的手。那时候我就假装问它，why? what you want boy?

如果它有耐心的话，它应该会回答我：很明显了好不好？我头痒啊，你帮我捉捉行不行？顺便sayang sayang我啦！人多，人家不好意思说嘛！

#8 当妈妈生气骂人的时候，那条傻狗不是一早不见狗影了，又或者是它会坐在你的脚上把头躲在你腋下。那时候我就会问它：什么事啊你？你想怎样？我要去小便了，你这样坐在我的脚也不是办法。

如果它那时候没有怕到漏尿的话，它应该可以回答我的说：哇，小主人！平时我对你这么好，你这次当帮帮我行不行。难道你看不出现在是世界大战４了吗？你还顾着小便，快护驾啦。把我送到安全的地方。

#9 换好衣服准备要出门的时候，傻狗都很热血沸腾的又吠。你又吠什么？我要出门了，小声点不要给妈妈知道。我不会带你去的，你死了条心吧！

如果它回答我的话，那我觉得它会很奸诈的说：嘿嘿嘿，小主人。我记得昨晚有人半夜三更出门，没有天亮也没回来哦。要么你现在带我出去，要么给我买条肉回来。年轻人，你自己选吧!

#10 朋友过来家拜访时，那条傻狗一定开心到又在家到处乱跑，跑了好多圈终于停下来了。这时候，它会骑上其中一个朋友身上要强奸了。我就会很生气地说：NO!! 你想干嘛？那是我朋友，几时轮到你来，给我滚进房间!

如果它回答我的话，都说了有福同享，我试过了再告诉你。

唉，hamsap dog! 你这好色狗气死我了！

#11 有时在吃东西的时候，它明明在看着我吃的，转过去的时候，它就假装没有在看。我很想问它，偷看就偷看啊，被我抓包了还假装没事情。你到底在想什么的傻狗？ 

我觉得它会流着口水回答我说：我想趁你不注意的时候偷咬一口看是什么味道的。 

这就是它被我拍下的证据！还看！

好呗，时间到。暂时就这样了。再见！ 

快说再见啦傻狗！